The difference between high performers and the highest performers often comes down to interpersonal skills. According to Dr. Henry Cloud, the basic interpersonal skill of listening may be the most effective way for leaders to build trust. In this episode, Henry explores the connection between listening, trust and performance with host Kim Simios. Uncovering counterintuitive and practical insights, they dig into why listening is important, the barriers to effective listening and how leaders can grow their listening skills.
Dr. Henry Cloud is an acclaimed leadership expert, clinical psychologist and New York Times best-selling author. His 45 books have sold nearly 15 million copies worldwide. He has an extensive executive coaching background and experience as a leadership consultant, devoting the majority of his time working with CEOs, leadership teams and executives to improve performance, leadership skills and culture. Dr. Cloud founded and built a healthcare company starting in 1987, which operated inpatient, and outpatient treatment centers in forty markets in the Western U.S. There, he served as Clinical Director and principal for ten years. In the context of hands-on clinical experience, he developed and researched many of the treatment principles and methods that he communicates to audiences today. After selling the company, he devoted his time to consulting and coaching, spreading principles of hope and life-change through speaking, writing and media. Throughout the same years and until the present, he has devoted much of his career to leadership performance and development, blending the disciplines of leadership and human functioning to helping CEO’s, teams, organizations and family entities. His book, Integrity, was dubbed by the New York Times as “the best book in the bunch.” In 2011, Necessary Endings was called “the most important book you read all year.” His book Boundaries For Leaders was named by CEO Reads in the top five leadership books of its year. His newest book, The Power of the Other, debuted at #5 on the Wall Street Journal bestseller list. Dr. Cloud’s work has been featured and reviewed by the New York Times, Wall Street Journal, Boston Globe, Publisher’s Weekly, Los Angeles Times, and many other publications. Success magazine named Dr. Cloud in the top 25 most influential leaders in personal growth and development, alongside Oprah, Brene Brown, Seth Godin and others.
Kim is a 30+ year veteran at Ernst & Young. Over the course of her career she has held various leadership roles, including 5 years as the Managing Partner for Ernst & Young’s Chicago office and as a global coordinating partner serving a broad spectrum of priority clients. Kim is Vice-chair of the Global Leadership Network board and serves as a board member trustee of the Shedd Aquarium and a member of the Dean’s Advisory Council for the Kelley School of Business at Indiana University. She also previously served on the boards of World Business Chicago and United Way of Metropolitan Chicago. Her diversity of experience gives her a broad network and unique perspective into matters that can impact organizations, including navigating changes in structure and culture, the regulatory landscape, and talent management.
Show Notes
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The difference between high performers and the highest performers often comes down to interpersonal skills. According to Dr. Henry Cloud, the basic interpersonal skill of listening may be the most effective way for leaders to build trust. In this episode, Henry explores the connection between listening, trust and performance with host Kim Simios. Uncovering counterintuitive and practical insights, they dig into why listening is important, the barriers to effective listening and how leaders can grow their listening skills.
KEY TAKEAWAYS:
The differentiator between high performers and the highest performers is most often coming down to interpersonal skills.
People do not move to your position until they feel that you understand them.
On a bio-chemical level, the people you are leading are asking, “Am I safe?”
People need to feel that their leaders are for them.
Listening is the key strategy for FBI hostage negotiation.
Barriers to listening:
Me first
Self-referent
Interruptions
Negation
Minimizing
Listening does not mean that you have to agree with the other person.
A great listening tool to try: Ask, “Is there anything that I don’t understand?”
The first step to developing listening shills is to shut up.
Developing listening skills:
Empathy
Open-ended questions
Full attention
When an organization is under stress, people are experiencing anxiety, fear and paralysis. Listening becomes the most important leadership skill. Listening will help leaders identify what problems need to be solved.
Listening Tour: In times of change, Henry advises leadership to identify the skeptics and to go on a tour to listen to them. The act of listening calms fears and begins to move people to get on board.
Listening builds trust. We don’t trust people who don’t understand who we are.
Listening leads to better results.
REFLECTION QUESTIONS:
Dr. Henry Cloud said that listening makes people feel understood and safe. Think about: 1) A leader who made you feel safe and 2) One who didn’t. What were the differences?
Henry identified five key barriers to listening. Which barrier do you tend to struggle with the most?
• Me First
• Self-Referent
• Interruption
• Negation
• Minimizing
Based on the conversation you heard today, what is one strategy you might try in your leadership to increase your listening skills this week?
Dr. Henry Cloud
Clinical Psychologist & Acclaimed Leadership Expert | Leadership UniversityKim Simios
Partner | Ernst & YoungEp 028 Dr. Henry Cloud with Kim Simios
TOPICS IN THIS PODCAST
CommunicationLeading OthersThe difference between high performers and the highest performers often comes down to interpersonal skills. According to Dr. Henry Cloud, the basic interpersonal skill of listening may be the most effective way for leaders to build trust. In this episode, Henry explores the connection between listening, trust and performance with host Kim Simios. Uncovering counterintuitive and practical insights, they dig into why listening is important, the barriers to effective listening and how leaders can grow their listening skills.
On This Podcast
Dr. Henry Cloud
Leadership University
Dr. Henry Cloud is an acclaimed leadership expert, clinical psychologist and New York Times best-selling author. His 45 books have sold nearly 15 million copies worldwide. He has an extensive executive coaching background and experience as a leadership consultant, devoting the majority of his time working with CEOs, leadership teams and executives to improve performance, leadership skills and culture. Dr. Cloud founded and built a healthcare company starting in 1987, which operated inpatient, and outpatient treatment centers in forty markets in the Western U.S. There, he served as Clinical Director and principal for ten years. In the context of hands-on clinical experience, he developed and researched many of the treatment principles and methods that he communicates to audiences today. After selling the company, he devoted his time to consulting and coaching, spreading principles of hope and life-change through speaking, writing and media. Throughout the same years and until the present, he has devoted much of his career to leadership performance and development, blending the disciplines of leadership and human functioning to helping CEO’s, teams, organizations and family entities. His book, Integrity, was dubbed by the New York Times as “the best book in the bunch.” In 2011, Necessary Endings was called “the most important book you read all year.” His book Boundaries For Leaders was named by CEO Reads in the top five leadership books of its year. His newest book, The Power of the Other, debuted at #5 on the Wall Street Journal bestseller list. Dr. Cloud’s work has been featured and reviewed by the New York Times, Wall Street Journal, Boston Globe, Publisher’s Weekly, Los Angeles Times, and many other publications. Success magazine named Dr. Cloud in the top 25 most influential leaders in personal growth and development, alongside Oprah, Brene Brown, Seth Godin and others.
Kim Simios
Ernst & Young
Kim is a 30+ year veteran at Ernst & Young. Over the course of her career she has held various leadership roles, including 5 years as the Managing Partner for Ernst & Young’s Chicago office and as a global coordinating partner serving a broad spectrum of priority clients. Kim is Vice-chair of the Global Leadership Network board and serves as a board member trustee of the Shedd Aquarium and a member of the Dean’s Advisory Council for the Kelley School of Business at Indiana University. She also previously served on the boards of World Business Chicago and United Way of Metropolitan Chicago. Her diversity of experience gives her a broad network and unique perspective into matters that can impact organizations, including navigating changes in structure and culture, the regulatory landscape, and talent management.
Show Notes
Get free, instant access to GLS Podcast Episode Show Notes. Leverage episode summaries, key takeaways, reflection questions, resources mentioned, related links and applicable downloads, including Show Notes PDF and Episode Audio File (MP3).
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SUMMARY:
The difference between high performers and the highest performers often comes down to interpersonal skills. According to Dr. Henry Cloud, the basic interpersonal skill of listening may be the most effective way for leaders to build trust. In this episode, Henry explores the connection between listening, trust and performance with host Kim Simios. Uncovering counterintuitive and practical insights, they dig into why listening is important, the barriers to effective listening and how leaders can grow their listening skills.
KEY TAKEAWAYS:
REFLECTION QUESTIONS:
• Me First
• Self-Referent
• Interruption
• Negation
• Minimizing
RESOURCES MENTIONED:
The Wall Street Journal
Integrity by Dr. Henry Cloud
Business Week Magazine
Michael Dell
Kevin Rollins
FBI Crisis Negotiation Unit
Ephesians 4:22-24
The Financial Crisis of 2008
Horst Schulze Room Service Story
RELATED LINKS:
Dr. Henry Cloud
Leadership University
Kim Simios
The Global Leadership Summit
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